It"s Always Something!!( a tale of muddy toes)

My sweet Sydney had a field trip that I had agreed to go on, to Scout's Island on the river. Since we take Chad to work in the morning we had approximately 28 minutes when we got back to get ready(all four of us girls),drop off the twins and be at Syd's school. Well, imagine my triumphant surprise when we got out of the door on time!! I pulled up to Paige's and the twins climbed out without me even having to get out of the car, and met her at the door like the little angels they so often are!( hear me snickering?) Sydney got out and closed the back door for them, and so I didn't make my horrifying discovery until we pulled up in front of her school and I went to get out of the car. I forgot to put shoes on!! With all of our frantic dressing and hair doing and make-up applying and seat belt buckling, Somehow I had gotten into the car without shoes!! I always take off my right shoe when I drive, so I hadn't even noticed the foot nakedness! I panicked in true Tara form, turning red and hissing at Sydney to just "go to class without me" as I searched the bottomless pit that is our back seat for something to put on my feet! I found a pair of flip flops( Praise the Lord!) and slipped my feet into them and ran to her class, only to sit there for fifteen minutes because the bus was late. Of course. This is my life I am so candidly sharing after all. My dear friend Amanda looks down at my feet(seriously, how often does one look at someones feet for goodness' sake?) and laughs out loud at me. She said, "good luck in those things" and laughs harder at my puzzled expression. Turns out there was a lot of muddy hiking involved with that particular field trip, and my just painted toes got quite the impromptu mud mask!! I have been slathering lotion on them for days now, but for some reason they still feel dry to me. Probably just a little over reaction, but really, can your feet be rubbed with too much lotion? I would have to say NO.

After Hours Closet Grooming!

Chad and I were sitting in the living room last night after the girls went to bed. We were having a delightful conversation when we were interrupted by muffled giggles coming from somewhere in the back of the house. I got up to investigate, and found the twins room empty, but my bedroom door ajar and a faint glow coming from behind it. A mystery? Not with twins; with two preschoolers there is always mischief afoot. I can tell the light is coming from our closet, but both doors are closed, probably in a vain attempt to keep themselves and their shenanigans hidden from us. I open the door to the debacle of brushing and shaving CareBears!! Payton was sitting on the floor with my toothbrush, brushing her new CareBears hair with it, and Brooklyn is sitting there with Chad's razor, shaving a bald spot into the back of her bear! A weird kind of hiccup-shout erupted from my throat, and I almost knocked Brookie down yanking the razor from her hand. I yelled out the dangers of Daddy's razor and the horrors of getting out of bed without permission as they both stood there crying and selling out their sister, little fingers pointed accusingly at the other as though they too were shocked she would do such a thing. I picked up my toothbrush that Payton had launched across the closet upon my abrupt arrival to discover it full of blue CareBear hair, and threw it onto the counter as I ushered them back to their own room. They cried their apologies as I tucked them back in, and sternly told them to stay in their beds this time. Knowing they would(they don't do getting in trouble well, it exhausts them), I went back out to tell Chad about it, and we both got a good laugh at the expense of the poor bald-backed bear. We have to find a higher place for the razor now, because apparently they are tall enough to reach it. Thank goodness it was just the bear that was shaved!!

A Funeral For a Fish Friend

Sadly, our bottom feeder Monster died on Friday. He had been swimming funny all week, and I had the sneaking suspicion that the end was near when I noticed he wasn't eating any of his yummy algae disks. Sydney took it hard. We have had the thing since she was three, and even though she couldn't pet it or play with it, she did talk to him every day. He didn't get buried until last night. Gross. Sydney felt that she needed a few days to mourn him before she put him into the ground, Chad and I called it his "viewing". I made Chad put it in a plastic bag and then put it back into the tank until they buried it so it wouldn't just be decomposing in the tank, but that ended up being gross too. Oh well, he was way too big to flush, and at least it's over now. Every one in my house is already talking about getting a new tenant for the tank, like a snake or a turtle, but I am demanding we leave it vacant for a while. I feigned respect for the dead, but the true reason is that I will inevitably be the one feeding ad caring for it, and I already begrudge doing that for the warm blooded animals that dwell with us. I would love to have a snake some day though, I like snakes. I do not however, want to feed it baby mice, so I told Chad to research alternative feeding methods before we get one. I have cleaned and removed the tank from the house, and so maybe everyone will forget about a new pet and we can all just enjoy the new found counter space in the bathroom!

CAUTION: This Story is About Fleas!--EEWWW!

We have, in the eternally precious words of Miss Brooklyn Beth Hiester, "bugs". That is to say fleas, which the sweet kitty we brought home six months ago is now apparently sharing with the rest of the house. We used Frontline on the cat and the dog at first, but after the fleas appeared to be gone, we stopped. Big Mistake. Ko-Ko showed up with them first, and no matter how many bath-and-tweezers sessions I had with her she just got worse. I finally had to take her to a groomer in shame, apologizing for the nature of my visit and avoiding eye contact at all costs. We got her cleaned up and Frontlined, so now she is happy and flea free. The cat has been Frontlined too, but unfortunately for Chad, you cannot Frontline husbands! For some reason that defies explanation, fleas love Chad, and so far seem to abhor the taste of me and my girls. This is not new knowledge, for we have had a run in with these little blood suckers before.
When my brother and sister in law went to Italy for their honeymoon, the five of us went and stayed at their house with the kids. We slept in their room (before Todd laid the new wood floor), and every night Chad would get eaten alive by these vile creatures. I of course believed none of it, since I had not one bite, not one, and we were sleeping right next to each other. He would get flustered trying to convince me, but after night four I had to concede because he WAS waking up with more bites than he was going to sleep with. I left that house with nary a bite to call my own. The man was tortured for days until they cleared up.
Now back to our present situation. I have not one bite, and the girls are clear too, but of course poor Chad is covered. I swear they lie in wait for him, and as soon as they hear him snore they unleash their masses upon his sleeping form!! He encounters fleas on the job occasionally, and the man reacts badly to them each time, but this is bad. The groomer said they wouldn't stay on us because our body temperature is too high, and Chad is a furnace as I have said, but the little buggers must love the taste of him to risk being seared alive during the meal! I fogged our room today, and tonight after he gets home, we will fog the house and leave for the recommended three hours, and then maybe he can get some sleep. The pest guy is coming Monday to spray the yard, so hopefully we can clear up the problem before I wake up one morning and Chad is just gone, eaten right out of his jammies! I have washed all of the bedding multiple times, and again today, but since we are renting this house we cannot just tear up the carpet, which is what we would like to do. Why can't every floor just be hardwood? That would solve so many of my cleaning problems, and I vow never to own a house with wall to wall carpet! I am sorry if the subject matter today has given you the willies, I would probably be more weirded out except that I never see any of them, just the devastation they leave in their tiny little wake!